Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Didn't I just say a few months back I was shutting down this blog? Ho hum. Just when things were going so well: back at work, among colleagues and friends, looking forward to new ambitions in the new year; new apartment/music studio/office, happy as pie about "single" life again; and just a'strollin' along with my foozy groove… Well, poo.

Although my blood values had been tip-top since the transplant, my energy levels had been running low. Really, it was only my legs that got tuckered, when walking up a flight of stairs. Doc and I puzzled over it each time I went in for my regular blood test. I had been renovating my new apartment - painting, cleaning, drilling, etc. - for months, and my arms weren't getting fatigued at all. Just the darn legs. In my astute if not lingering nature, I finally noticed that my shoes were fitting a bit tight, and my legs, too, were a little thick. Showed the doc, who ordered an ultrasound and a CT. Turns out, I was holding water (to my credit, Scotty, I was not withholding toast). CT showed, reason being, the boat is back. About the same size as it was 2.5 years ago when it first reared its ugly head. Means business again, in the way of exerting Congress-like pressure on my kidneys and arteries to filibuster passage. (Which, by the way, Fillibuster T. Passage, I-KS, one of the Mid-West's all-time-leading Senate orators of the 1800s.)

So doc put me on cortisone to pass the pending legislation, which has helped. I can walk stairs with ease again. Since last week Monday, I've started up again with the chemotherapy. Old habits are hard to break. Had my follow-up sessions yesterday and today. Rituximab again. Did the trick the first time around, and I'm confident it will do so again. I'm used to it by now. Wasn't so bad. Slept through most. They also threw a new chem at me this week. Hadn't had it yet, but they tell me it doesn't make your hair fall out. I can keep the eyebrows this time around. So I got that goin' for me. Which is nice.

Doing my chemo rounds this time as an out-patient (i.e., same-day service). I do NOT plan to take another extended leave of absence. The plan is for four out-patient chemo sessions, at one-month intervals. During and after this treatment series, my doctors and I will be exploring further or parallel treatment options, perhaps radiation therapy - which, is an option now that I've told the doc that the 50-50 shot of a donor transplant, and thereafter a life squeezed in between trips to the clinic, is NOT an option for me. So we've still got a few tricks up our sleeves.

And so I pick up this ol' blog, and let my Facebook page highlight the brighter side of life. Rest assured that I am resolved to continue this fight, and I'm actually in good spirits. It doesn't come as a total shocker to me, and it's not like I haven't had the last two years to confront the various emotions and mental demons that come with the territory. This time, I'm in a different frame of mind. Got a lot more positive emotional energy. Happiness on my side. Actually, at this very moment, I'm lovin' me some Girl Scouts cookies. Thin Mints. As before, again and ever more, the dude abides.